When is denial helpful
Chances are, you have. The problem with a phrase like this is that it allows you to deny your role in a given situation. As much as you might like to think the world revolves around you, the reality is that the whole world probably isn't conspiring against you and your relationships. Therefore, it might be time to get honest with yourself and ask how you've contributed to the situation. Your actions do have weight, and they impact you as well as others.
Blame allows you to shift the responsibility for your actions to someone else or a group of individuals, but it doesn't help you solve the problem at hand. Take note when you use superlative language to describe the cause of your circumstances. It can be a sign that you are denying or ignoring the way your actions are impacting your circumstances. After all, you are the common denominator in all of your dilemmas and difficult situations.
When you're surrounded by individuals who think the way you do, it can be easy to deny reality because your social circle is reinforcing your denial. After all, they likely see the world just as you do. The most important thing you can do to avoid this trap is to be mindful of the people you surround yourself with.
The people you keep close should be supportive and responsible. Think of them as a reflection of yourself. Be open to people who think differently than you do. Allow them to challenge your thinking on various issues and be willing to examine your assumptions and opinions. You might find yourself asking different questions about a situation or considering facts you've been ignoring because they didn't fit into your version of reality. Additionally, you might practice grounding yourself.
There are several grounding techniques you can use to do this. The goal is to bring you back to the real world while also allowing you to calm any anxiety you might have. Finally, think about asking for help. The advice and support of a close friend or family member can truly go a long way. If you need additional support, a great in-person or online therapist can help you move past denial.
Depending on your level of denial, a therapist may use different techniques to help you address it. Even though addiction is formally classified as a chronic, relapsing brain disorder and a mental illness, there is still a stigma that surrounds addiction.
Unfortunately, these ideas provoke stigmatizing language, such as:. Words are powerful. Consequently, these preconceived ideas about addiction have the ability to deter those who are suffering away from admitting their problem and seeking help. A person may begin believing that there is something wrong with his or her behaviors, leading an individual to try and fix it on their own. Instead of acknowledging and seeking help for a problem that cannot be controlled alone, stigma drives some people to suffer in silence.
Denial is an attempt to cope, rationalize, or excuse behaviors in one way or another. It refers to failing to acknowledge an unacceptable emotion or truth. Denial can sometimes seem irrational, but it is used as a defense mechanism against situations or circumstances that are painful and overwhelming. While it can be difficult for a person suffering from addiction to recognize that they are in denial, family members and loved ones can usually detect denial from a mile away.
Some signs that an addicted loved one is in denial include:. As a defense mechanism, denial is a normal reaction to stressful situations. After all, denial gives the mind time to unconsciously take in shocking or distressful information without sending people into shock. If denial persists, it can prevent a person from taking action to deal with his or her problems. Addiction is a particularly dangerous concept for someone to be in denial about. A person who denies that they have a problem will be reluctant to seek help.
On some level, you know there is a problem that needs to be addressed, but you feel that nothing you do or say will make a difference. When other people try to offer advice or help, you might brush off their concern by pretending to agree or telling them to mind their own business.
Like other defense mechanisms, denial functions as a way to protect you from experiencing anxiety. In some cases, it might be a way to avoid dealing with stress or painful emotions. By refusing to deal with or even admit that there is something wrong, you are trying to prevent facing stress, conflict, threats, fears, and anxieties. Denial serves a few different purposes.
First, using this defense mechanism means you don't have to acknowledge the problem. Second, it also allows you to minimize the potential consequences that might result. Denial is sometimes seen more often with certain types of mental health conditions. People who have substance abuse disorder , alcohol use disorder , and narcissistic personality disorder , for example, may use this defense mechanism more often to avoid facing the reality of their condition.
Denying a problem exists allows the individual to continue engaging in destructive behavior without addressing the problem. Denial is a common way for people to avoid dealing with troubling feelings. Some examples:. Denial isn't always a bad thing. When dealing with something shocking or distressing, being in denial can give you a little time and space to gradually, often unconsciously , come to grips with the change.
For example, you might stay in denial to some degree about a health concern because you don't want to face the possibility of being seriously ill. Rather than needlessly worrying, being in denial can give you a little time to come to terms and remain calm while you seek the advice of a health professional.
In other cases, however, denial can be problematic and even harmful. For example, if you stay in denial about a health condition and never see a doctor about it, the problem might worsen.
Likewise, if you are in denial about symptoms of a mental illness such as anxiety or depression , you might delay seeking help from your doctor or mental health professional.
Overcoming denial often depends on the nature of the problem. People often come to terms with the reality of a situation on their own given time and support. Try to determine if he or she just needs a little time to work through the issue.
At the same time, let the person know that you're open to talking about the subject, even if it makes both of you uncomfortable. Ultimately, this might give your loved one the security he or she needs to move forward. Your loved one may even be relieved when you bring the issue up. If your loved one is in denial about a serious health issue, such as depression, cancer or an addiction, broaching the issue might be especially difficult. Listen and offer your support.
Don't try to force someone to seek treatment, which could lead to angry confrontations. Offer to meet together with a doctor or mental health provider. There is a problem with information submitted for this request. Sign up for free, and stay up-to-date on research advancements, health tips and current health topics, like COVID, plus expert advice on managing your health. Error Email field is required.
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